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You’re a young journalist who has left the university having graduated with the highest honors, bent on being the heir to Anderson Cooper and set on changing the world.

And here it is, your big chance, a drunk-and-Lord-knows-what-else homeless couple getting “spontaneous” in broad daylight in Norfolk, Va. Well, she had sex. Her suitor didn’t appear to be in the mood. In fact, he was passed out. Police said he was unconscious.

Some stuff is better left for Oprah.

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An instant classic, and you only thought you’d seen it all. This would’ve been the day you took Grandma to Luby’s.

Hey, he who hasn’t had sex in … make that “on” the mall parking lot shall cast the first viagra.

So, let’s review:

“I was in the mood. And, basically that’s what happened,” the babe said.

How did this happen? “Alcohol.”

Duh.

“The alcohol made me think that I wouldn’t get caught. I’m not into erotic public sex.” Obviously.

Asking whether it would ever happen again is tantamount to asking if they’ll ever take another drag of crystal meth, but the lady of the day emphatically says “no.”

But what’s there to hide at this point, you’ve just had sex in public?

“I don’t know,” said Romeo.

Honesty is the best policy.

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